We have dinner at Nonni's house every Sunday. This Sunday, before lunch, my sister called to tell me she was bringing her friend to lunch. It's always fun when someone new meets the infamous Nonni. But this was something else altogether. My sister informed me that her friend is allergic to gluten and she would be bringing a salad to lunch so she would have something to eat. I couldn't believe my sister was subjecting her poor, innocent friend to this. This could not possibly go well. I got there early and set the table. I chose not to forewarn my grandmother about our guest, choosing instead to watch from the sidelines. It went something like this...
(just imagine Nonni with a thick Italian accent)
Amanda: Nonni, Lauren is allergic to gluten, so she brought a salad to eat.
Nonni: She's what?
Amanda: Allergic to gluten.
Amy: Allergic to flour. So she can't eat pasta.
Nonni: She doesn't like pasta? (to Lauren) You don't like pasta?
Amanda: No, Nonni, she's allergic. It makes her sick.
Nonni: I don't know about this.
Amy: She's fine Nonni. She has a salad.
Nonni: Well, she can eat meatballs.
Amanda: Yes. she can eat meatballs.
Amy: No, she can't eat meatballs. Your meatballs have bread crumbs which have flour. And she's allergic.
Nonni: So what is she going to eat?
Amanda: Her salad. Really Nonni, it's fine.
10 minutes later
Nonni to Lauren: Here, have some meatballs.
Amanda: Nonni, she CANNOT eat meatballs.
Nonni to Lauren: You don't like meatballs?
Dad: It's not that she doesn't like meatballs. She's allergic to the bread crumbs in them. They make her sick. She's fine Mom.
Nonni: Well, I'm sorry you can't eat anything. (I had wondered when the guilt was coming)
Meanwhile, Kurt sat back, clearly enjoying the ridiculous interaction. As we were leaving, I scolded my sister for subjecting her friend to Nonni. Her friend interjected: "Oh, I wanted to meet Nonni. I hear Amanda on the phone with her all the time and I just had to meet her."
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