The Sweet Smell of Onions

I love the smell of raw onions. I'm making dinner right now and just cut some onions for the veggies. The smell is filling the house. I love it. I think it should be a candle scent. I'd buy it and burn that baby night and day. I'm one of the lucky few that doesn't cry when I cut onions, so of course, whenever there are onions to be cut, the job falls to me. And I am happy to do it. I think not crying lets me enjoy the scent more. Growing up, my dad used to make homemade sauce, meatballs, and pasta on the weekends. He'd start early, so my sister and I would wake up to the smell of onions and tomatoes simmering - and also to the lovely sound of the grinder as it ground and mixed the meat and celery, etc. for the meatballs, but let's focus on the positive. Waking up to that smell was something I looked forward to every time my dad decided to make sauce. Now, every time I smell an onion it takes me back to those memories.

I am a bridesmaid. I was thrilled to be asked and am so excited to perform my various bridesmaid duties (helping the bride to pee, etc.), but I have been presented with a challenge. Now, I have always vowed to myself that when I am asked to be a bridesmaid, I will be the best bridesmaid I can be. I will be there for the bride to do what the bride wants, when she wants it, with a smile on my face. Well, the bride wants a stripper for her bachelorette party. And guess who's in charge of booking said stripper. You guessed it, yours truly. You should probably know that I don't have the warmest feelings towards strippers. I find them to be kind of dirty (no offense to any strippers who stumble across my blog - actually, if any strippers happen to be reading this, we'll be needing your services soon - please contact me asap). I had visions in my head of porn-site-viruses attacking my computer with full force and killing it mercilessly when I type the words "male stripper" into google. I even tried looking in the yellow pages to avoid my computer's imminent death, to no avail. Despite what you see on TV (Friends to be specific) there are no strippers, adult entertainers, or exotic dancers listed in the phonebook, in case you were wondering. My feelings towards strippers aside, this is what my friend wants, and what my friend wants, she will have. Come Hell or high water, there will be a stripper at her bachelorette party because I vow to be the best Goddamn bridesmaid there is.

PS: I actually went as far as to search for one this evening (while holding my breath and crossing my fingers) and as you can see, my blog is updated, so my computer is still chugging along. And I think I've found a legit site - Yay! Will call this week to discuss business and will keep you updated on the search. If anyone has any **appropriate** recommendations (let's keep this clean here), please let me know because I am totally out of my element with this one.

On my nightstand:

I'm about halfway through The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie and I'm totally loving it. The heroine is feisty and smart. I absolutely love her. I want to be her even though she's eleven and is obsessed with poison. No, scratch that. I want to be her BECAUSE she's eleven and is obsessed with poison. AND because her name is Flavia. I love her name because it's the name of my Italian cousin, and also of the instant coffee machine at work.

So far, she's investigating a murder in her family's garden, riding all over town on her bicycle, which she calls Gladys (that right there should make you buy the book!). It's written so well, I love her voice. The main character is dark and witty and morbid, but silly and sweet at the same time. Plus, the book itself is really cute. I love the cover - I think it's perfect. It's hardcover, but it's small, the size of a Mass Market book (think trashy romance novel-size) and doesn't have a jacket. It's adorable. I think all books should have this packaging. Anyway, pick it up. It's awesome.