Pressure

I read an article today in Elle about nose jobs. It presented the viewpoints of two women; one who regretted her choice to “fix” her nose, and one who was happy with the decision. Both were well-thought out and presented interesting points about plastic surgery and the pressure to be beautiful. I was surprised, however, that the anti-rhinoplasty opinion wasn’t represented. The article felt incomplete without it. I find many magazine articles to be superficial and so, disappointing, but I liked this one. I’m sure most girls struggle with the decision of whether or not to get a nose job at some point in their lives. I certainly did. Growing up, I hated my nose. I thought it was too big for my tiny face, accentuated by my equally hated glasses. I longed for the day when I could get it “fixed.”

I was a shy child. I was most certainly not that rare confident, outgoing preteen. I was awkward and felt that awkwardness through and through. I had friends, good grades, and was active in sports and extracurricular, but I still struggled with my looks and thought a new nose would fix that. I was actually a pretty cute kid, looking back. But I was seeing myself through the eyes of the insecure 12-year old I was, in a society that said beauty = good. I think most girls can identify, no matter what they looked like.

Somewhere along the way, I grew into my nose, or into myself, I’m not sure which. It’s not perfect, but it’s not bad either. Sure, there’s that little bump in the middle or the trademark McCormick ball at the end, but I’ve learned to accept it. From the front, I like it; from the side, I don’t. I really don’t like my profile, but still, I’d never change it. I can’t imagine what it must be like to wake up one day, look in the mirror, and see someone else’s nose. I think it would be unsettling.

Reading the points of view of those girls made me think about our society and the ways in which the pressure to be beautiful affects women. There is so much emphasis placed on beauty and youth, instead of experience and graceful aging. For some, surgery is a personal choice. Like one of the girls who realized after years of refusing a nose job, her large nose defined her, instead of the other way around. I respect that and understand it. It’s hard to emerge untouched from our society. I know I’m guilty of being superficial at times; I almost always wear some type of makeup and like nice clothes. But even more so than before, my goal is to accept my looks and myself for who I am. That means no botox or facelifts in 40 years and aging gracefully. Although I guess that’s easy to say when you’re wrinkle-free and under 30, so ask me again in 40 years. I hope my answer will be the same.